


A Trail of Petals

by cr5nus4turn



Category: NINE PERCENT (Band), 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, hanahaki, hanahaki!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-15 20:03:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15420546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cr5nus4turn/pseuds/cr5nus4turn
Summary: Helpless. That's what he would describe himself as. That's what he thought he looked like right now - longing for air, eyes already sore from crying, coughing his Lungs out. The white petals around him were covered in blood.





	A Trail of Petals

**Author's Note:**

> [Hanahaki]  
> The hanahaki disease infects people who are affected by one-sided love. A surgery can be done to prevent the predictable death - skilled surgeons can remove the growing roots and petals that have grown in the lung and heart area - although like every other surgery, there are risks and side effects.  
> 1) After the succesfull surgery,  
> 1.1) the patient is no longer able to fall in love with the person that was the cause of the disease.  
> 1.2) with a chance of roughly 1%, the patient will no longer be able to fall in love at all.
> 
> 2) After a failed surgery,  
> 2.1) the patient still has leftovers from the disease, thus not being able to cure.  
> 2.2) the disease will become even more severe. The patient's bones will either get weak or (mostly in cases where the patient has the specific type of Rose-Hanahaki) the bones can grow thorns, leading to the body hurting from the inside and to a more painful death due to the thorns piercing through the skin.
> 
> [Hydrangea] symbolizes heartfelt emotions. It can be used to express gratitude for being understood. In its negative sense hydrangea symbolizes frigidity and heartlessness.

Helpless. That's what he would describe himself as. That's what he thought he looked like right now - longing for air, his eyes already sore from crying, coughing his Lungs out. The white petals around him were covered in blood.

 

* * *

 

 

Yanjun was 4 when he met his best friend. He and Zhangjing basically grew up together.

 

Zhangjing was there when Yanjun became sick in 6th grade.

 

Zhangjing was there when Yanjun had his first fight with his parents in 8th grade.

 

He cared about him, and Yanjun wasn't sure where he would be now without Zhangjing.

 

Zhangjing was there when Yanjun met his first love when he was in 9th grade.

 

Zhangjing was there when Yanjun started dating the boy in 10th grade.

 

He was with him, with Yanjun in his arms, 3 weeks after the latter broke up with his first love.

Zhangjing didn't care that his shirt was stained in blood - Yanjun's blood, that his hair, his lap, the surroundings were covered in white petals.

 

He called the hospital for an emergency-surgery.

 

The surgery was a success, so Yanjun was allowed to leave the hospital a few days after the surgery. When he left, he noticed how many people were actually suffering from the Hanahaki disease. _A cruel world._

* * *

 

 

Zhangjing was there when Yanjun locked himself in his room.

 

Eventually, after what felt like hours of pleading, knocking - Yanjun opened the door.

 

**"Zhangjing, do you think I'm a murderer?"**

 

He shook his head. 

 

**"But people are dying, because of me."**

 

Zhangjing sighed and pulled his best friend into a tight hug.

 

"Don't think of yourself like that. You can't do anything about it. It's not your fault."

 

* * *

 

 

"Why haven't you told me?"

 

Silence.

 

"Yanjun, I'm not mad, but... I thought you'd tell me."

 

**"I might've just forgotten about it... I just remembered it again. I've talked to some people, most of them were actually my ideal type, you know? But I just... There wasn't anything at all. And then I remembered that the doctor told me about that small chance of this happening."**

 

* * *

 

 

Even more people have died in the last few weeks - everyone having the same type of Hanahaki. Coughing up small, white petals. Hydrangea.

 

Yanjun felt like he pulled a trail of petals behind him. Kind of like a trail of blood, when a serial killer that didn't work that carefully, and left the crime scene. And if Yanjun had to be honest, he really felt like a serial killer.

 

To prevent more people from falling in love with him, he decided to stay at Zhangjing's place. He already had his own apartment.

 

Of course Zhangjing agreed.

 

* * *

 

 

The only social contact Yanjun had was with Zhangjing, and he felt like it was enough. He felt like he was with his parents again - without the constant fights. Zhangjing cared about him so much.

 

And maybe, at one point, Yanjun thought that his friend cared a bit too much.

 

* * *

 

 

It was Yanjun's turn to worry about his friend now. His smaller friend seemed to become sick. But Zhangjing always told him it was a cold, nothing too severe.

 

And at the beginning, Zhangjing himself thought it was only a cold.

 

Until he felt something weird in his mouth.

 

He went to the bathroom, opened his mouth

 

and saw a small, white petal on his tongue.

 

* * *

 

 

**"Are you sure you're okay?"**

 

A quick nod from his friend.

 

**"Are you _really_ sure? You don't talk as much as usual."**

 

"I just have a sore throat, that's all-"

 

Zhangjing barely finished his sentence and started coughing, being really careful to keep the petals in his mouth. Even though they were really uncomfortably clumped up in his throat.

 

He just didn't want Yanjun to feel worse than he already did.

 

He didn't want to bring it up again - since Yanjun had already forgotten about all the deaths he caused.

 

* * *

 

**"You sure you trust me? Are you really going to leave me alone in here for a week?"**

 

"There's more than enough food in the fridge, you're not gonna starve."

 

And with that, Zhangjing left to go to his parents.

 

That's what he had told Yanjun.

 

It wasn't necessarily a lie, but also not really the truth.

 

Yes, he stayed at his parent's house for the week, but he also went to the hospital to get the surgery at the very end of the week.

 

Zhangjing came back, feeling way better, without a sign of any sickness.

 

* * *

 

 

Yanjun woke up in the middle of the night. After he looked at the alarm clock he was confused as to why he was already awake, until he heard sounds coming from the bathroom.

 

When he realized the bed next to him was empty, Yanjun got up and sprinted to the bathroom - almost tripping over something since the room was pitch black.

 

He leaned against the Bathroom door and heard Zhangjing sobbing, coughing and crying in agony.

 

For a second Yanjun prayed that the door wasn't locked and he thanked god when he was able to burst into the bathroom - only to regret it a second later as he took in the sight of his best friend.

 

Covered in small, white petals.

 

Stained in blood.

 

His screams and cries gradually turning into small, short breaths.

 

_Helpless. That's what Yanjun would describe his friend as. That's what he thought Zhangjing looked like right now - longing for air, his eyes already sore from crying, coughing his Lungs out. The white petals around him were covered in blood. And Yanjun was just as helpless because it already seemed to be too late.  
_

 

Yanjun felt his heart shatter as his best friend looked him straight in the eyes.

 

He fell down to his knees, not feeling any pain since the petals were already in a thick layer on the floor, almost like a carpet.

 

**"Who did this to you, Zhangjing? Please, please tell me, I-"**

 

"I don't... Want you to... Feel bad again..."

 

_Please, oh god, please stop smiling like that._

 

He couldn't stand looking at that weak, sad smile.

 

**"Zhangjing it- it was me right? I'm sorry... I'm sorry for making you suffer like that. I didn't want this. But why...? Why now? Why after I told you about that fucking side effect. You were fine before, why did you fall in love with me...?"**

 

"It felt like it was the right thing..."

 

Yanjun could only barely understand him. Zhangjin's voice was so quiet, weak and shaky.

 

"Please, promise me... You are going to live a normal life again... You will be fine, it's not your fault someone dies. It's the disease. It just... happens..."

 

Yanjun nodded quickly, pulling his friend into a tight hug.

 

"Yanjun?"

 

He didn't give him a response, but he made sure the other knew he was listening.

 

"I love you."

 

And with these last words, the warm breath Yanjun felt on his neck disappeared.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Oh boy do I love writing angst. I don't even know if this was good or trash but it kind of made fun writing it? (That sounded sadistic I really don't want Yanjun or Zhangjing to be hurt like that but I hope you knoW WHAT I MEAN)
> 
> so  
> anyways  
> thanks for kudos and comments  
> also some criticism and suggestions on what i could do better <3


End file.
